Reclaiming Your Power: A Journey of Healing and Transformation

In my journey as a therapist, I have witnessed the profound impact that connecting with our deeper selves can have on the healing process. Often, the biggest barriers to healing are the stories we tell ourselves and the patterns we’ve internalised over time. These patterns may be limiting, based on fear, or simply disconnected from our true nature.

In today’s post, I want to share a powerful excerpt from my novel Holy Cunt, which explores the journey of reclaiming our power and stepping into our true selves. After the excerpt, I will introduce a practical healing tool that you can use to begin unraveling old patterns, reclaim your power, and heal.

From Holy Cunt: I’m almost forty now. It took me a long time. I whisper my apologies to the starry night. I tell them I didn’t understand. But I’m ready now. I’ve been living with fear my whole life. It never held me back. Rather, it kept me stuck to the archetype of a warrioress. Fearless and strong. Pushy. I was fast, ambitious, driven, and focused. And in this race, I completely disregarded my true self. Because of fear of who I am, of my true power. Fear that if I stop for long enough and listen, I might hear a completely different song of Aya. A song so different from ‘normal’ that I would be exiled. Feared. Rejected. What an irony. I have been feared and rejected by myself instead.

Various lifetimes. The family scars – my mother’s and her mother’s and hers before… and so on in all the women from the beginning of humanity. The deep earthy wisdom they carried, I too carry in my bones. Their pain and rejection are at the forefront. It shows in my lifetime too, as patterns and stories that I’m attracted to like a moth to the light of a bulb. They are all inviting me to heal, surrender, let go of them, with love and compassion.

Yes, I am a different person. It all ends with me. I am no longer afraid. I will listen. I will become a dedicated apprentice of Me. I’ve been procrastinating long enough. I am ready.

In this excerpt, the character faces the realisation that the fear and stories that have shaped her identity for years have been self-imposed. She has been playing a role—the “warrioress”—because it felt safer. But now, as she enters a new phase of life, she’s ready to stop running from her true self. She’s ready to listen, to heal, and to embrace her power.

Healing Tool: The Power of Self-Inquiry

Self-inquiry is a simple, yet transformative healing tool. It’s a process of asking deep, reflective questions that help you uncover the layers of fear, conditioning, and limiting beliefs you’ve carried with you. These beliefs often don’t reflect who you truly are, but they shape your thoughts, emotions, and actions nonetheless.

Self-inquiry helps you get in touch with the parts of you that you’ve suppressed or neglected. It allows you to take back your power, claim your authentic self, and begin the process of true healing. This practice can be used for a variety of purposes: understanding your fears, clearing limiting beliefs, exploring your desires, and reconnecting with your essence.

How to Practice Self-Inquiry:

1. Create a Safe Space
   Find a quiet place where you can sit undisturbed for a few minutes. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths to relax and center yourself. If possible, light a candle or create an atmosphere that feels soothing to you.
2. Ask the Question
   Begin by asking yourself a deep, open-ended question. This could be something like:
   • What am I afraid of right now?
   • What story am I telling myself that no longer serves me?
   • What parts of myself have I neglected or hidden from others?
   • What do I need to hear right now?
3. Observe Your Thoughts and Feelings
   Allow the question to settle into your mind. Don’t rush to answer immediately. Simply observe the thoughts, emotions, or images that arise in response to your question. Don’t judge them—just let them be.
4. Dive Deeper
   When an answer or emotion comes up, ask yourself, “Why do I feel this way?” or “What is the root of this belief?” Keep asking until you reach a deeper understanding or realization. This is where the true healing happens—when you begin to unearth the unconscious patterns that have been controlling your life.
5. Integrate Your Insights
   Once you’ve gained insight into the source of your fear or limiting belief, spend some time reflecting on how you can begin to release it. You might want to journal about your discoveries, write a letter to your past self, or simply sit with the emotions that have come up.
6. Allow Compassion to Flow
   The process of self-inquiry can sometimes bring up uncomfortable emotions. Allow yourself to feel compassion for yourself as you confront these parts of you. Healing comes when you accept yourself fully, both the light and the shadow.

How Self-Inquiry Can Heal:

Self-inquiry allows you to get to the heart of your struggles and limitations. By consciously bringing awareness to the beliefs and fears that have been running in the background, you can begin to understand where they came from and how to release them. This practice helps you reclaim your power by allowing you to make conscious choices rather than unconsciously repeating patterns that no longer serve you.

When you practice self-inquiry, you begin to see yourself clearly. You can identify the false narratives that have been holding you back and replace them with a more empowering story. This process helps you reconnect with your true self, which is free from fear and judgment.

Why I’m Sharing This with You:

In my work as a therapist, I’ve found self-inquiry to be one of the most effective tools for deep, lasting healing. It helps you confront your fears, reclaim your power, and align with your authentic self. It’s a tool I use in my practice with clients who are looking to heal old wounds, break free from limiting beliefs, and embrace their full potential.

I also explore themes of self-discovery and empowerment in my novel Holy Cunt. The protagonist, Aya, embarks on a journey of healing, reclaiming her power, and finally listening to the whispers of her true self. Her story is a reminder that healing is possible, and it often starts with asking the right questions.

Healing is not about perfection—it’s about the willingness to face yourself, listen to your needs, and let go of what no longer serves you. Through practices like self-inquiry, you can uncover the layers of fear and conditioning that have been holding you back, and in doing so, you reclaim your true power.

If you’re ready to embark on a deeper journey of self-discovery and healing, I invite you to explore my novel Holy Cunt. It’s a story of reclaiming personal power, healing from past wounds, and reconnecting with the wisdom that resides within us all.

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Here’s a gift for you, click on the button to download the instructions for Self Inquiry practice:

Enjoy x